Why Humans Are So Smart (But Dinosaurs Were Dumb): A Trump-Style Rant

You know, folks, it's really quite amazing. Dinosaurs were around for 170 million years and never evolved intelligence. And yet, here we are, humans, with our big brains and fancy gadgets, after just a few hundred thousand years. How did we do it? Well, maybe it's because we're just smarter than those old dinosaurs. Maybe it's because we had the right mix of genes and environment. Or maybe it's because we had a little help from some higher power. Who knows?

But let me tell you, if we humans were to ascend to heaven or upload to some cosmic server, and leave behind all the junk we've created on this planet, like plastic and electronic waste, then maybe the Earth could thrive again. Maybe we could use some kind of special microbe to break down all that garbage, or some kind of advanced technology to erase all the traces of our civilization. And then, maybe the next intelligent species to evolve on this planet, like mice, would look back at us and wonder why it took us so long to evolve intelligence. They might say, 'Gee, those humans sure had big brains, but it took them millions of years to figure out how to live in harmony with their environment. Meanwhile, we mice started from scratch, and in just a few thousand years, we built a utopian society that colonized the stars. Ha ha ha!'