Confucius on Mourning: Why 3 Years?

In ancient China, when parents passed away, their children were expected to observe a three-year mourning period. This meant no entertainment, banquets, or official duties. Some, like Zai Yu, felt three years was too long and argued that one year was enough. But Confucius saw this as lacking compassion. He believed the three-year period was a natural reflection of the three years a child is nurtured by their parents before walking. Parents give so much, and this time is a way to express gratitude. After three years, the mourning rituals end, but the love and remembrance for parents should never fade. Confucius saw the three-year period as a balance: a reminder for those overly grieving to find a way to live again, and a lesson for the indifferent to learn the importance of gratitude.