翻译下介列篇章在我们前面提到的几种家庭倾向中普遍缺乏一种对孩子自我感的基本支持。过分的控制破坏了孩子可以独立生存、独立选择和自己规划人生的自我感。一个专注于成就的家庭透过表现来看待孩子这会让孩子处在一个不安全的境地。过度赞扬会让孩子产生一种不现实的全能感——我可以做任何事情!因为父母不去帮助孩子容忍失败和接受现实。相反一个很少受到称赞的孩子或者一个经常受到批评的孩子可能会一直认为他除了令人失望之外

In several types of family tendencies mentioned earlier, there is generally a lack of basic support for a child's sense of self. Excessive control undermines the child's ability to survive independently, make independent choices, and plan their own lives. An achievement-oriented family views children through their performance, which can leave the child in an insecure position. Excessive praise can create an unrealistic sense of omnipotence in the child - "I can do anything!" - because parents do not help the child tolerate failure and accept reality. On the other hand, a child who receives little praise or is frequently criticized may constantly feel that they can't do anything besides disappointing others - "I am worthless!" When personality factors are ignored and only achievement is emphasized, the child cannot develop a broad-minded self-image. In many families of procrastinators, some humane qualities are often overlooked or underestimated, such as a sense of humor, the ability to make friends, passionate hobbies or creative talents, willpower to make great efforts in completing tasks, and empathetic abilities.